How to Handle Criticism When You’re Highly Sensitive | What to Do When Your Bubble Gets Poked
In Part 1 of this series, I wrote about Our Beautiful Bubble – the quiet space where sensitive moms can finally breathe. In Part 2, we talked about Walls vs Bubbles – how to protect your heart without pushing everyone away. But what happens when, just as you’re finally feeling calm,
someone comes along and pokes your bubble? A sharp comment.
A careless joke.
A nagging voice.
A tiny text that somehow ruins your whole mood. (Last week, for me, it was a short email about a small mistake—and it ruined my whole afternoon.) Your body tightens.
Your mind starts replaying the words.
Your heart whispers, “See? This is why I hide…” Today’s post is about those moments –
and how to walk through them without losing yourself.
What it feels like when your bubble is poked
For sensitive, big-hearted people, “small” things don’t always feel small:
A relative says, “You’re still at that job? When are you getting serious?” A friend jokes about your parenting in front of others. Your partner dismisses your feelings with, “You’re overthinking again.” A WhatsApp message comes in with that tone you recognise: criticism dressed as “just being honest”.
On the outside, we may stay quiet or laugh it off.
On the inside, it feels like: pressure in the chest a lump in the throat a voice in our head saying “Maybe they’re right. Maybe I am too much / not enough.” That’s your bubble being poked. And you know what?
It makes sense that it hurts.
You built that bubble to feel safe. Any sharp edge will feel intense against it.
Not every poke is an attack (but it still matters)
Some pokes are intentional:
People who enjoy stirring drama Those who use “jokes” to hide their criticism But sometimes the poke comes from:
people who don’t understand your sensitivity someone who is stressed and spilling it onto you a loved one who thinks they’re “helping” by pointing out flaws Understanding this doesn’t mean you must tolerate everything.
It just helps you pick the right response: Is this a boundary issue? A miscommunication? Or an old wound being touched? You deserve to explore that gently.
Step 1: Pause the storm inside your body
Before you respond to the person,
you need to respond to yourself. When your bubble gets poked:
Notice the physical reaction. “My chest feels tight.” “My jaw is clenching.” “I suddenly feel small.” Name what just happened. “My bubble got poked.” “That comment hurt.” Give yourself a small buffer. A slow drink of water A trip to the bathroom A deep breath before you type back Even 30–60 seconds can stop you from reacting out of shock or shame. You don’t have to have the perfect reply immediately.
You’re allowed to pause.
Step 2: Ask three gentle questions
Once your body calms a little, try asking yourself:
What exactly did they say or do?
Take the facts only, no dramatic add-ons. “She said: ‘You’re always so emotional.’” What story did my mind attach to it?
“My brain translated it as: ‘I’m a problem. I’m annoying. I’m weak.’” Is that story actually true – or just familiar?
Sometimes the sting is less about this moment,
and more about a lifetime of similar comments. Seeing the difference between facts and stories doesn’t make the hurt disappear,
but it gives you back some power.
Step 3: Decide if this person belongs inside your bubble
Not everyone should have the same level of access to your heart. Ask yourself:
Has this person earned a place closer to my bubble?
Do they usually care, listen, and try to understand? Is this a one-off slip, or a repeated pattern?
One careless comment from a usually loving person
is not the same as ongoing disrespect. Do I feel safer after talking to them… or always smaller? Your answer guides your next move:
gentle honest conversation, a clear boundary, or more distance.
Step 4: Choose a response that protects your peace
Here are a few options, from softest to firmer.
You can adjust the tone to match the relationship. Option A: Light boundary + clarity For people who are usually safe, but said something hurtful.
“When you say it that way, it feels like you’re dismissing my feelings.” “I know you mean well, but that comment really poked a sore spot for me.” “I’m already hard on myself about this. I need support more than criticism.” You’re not attacking.
You’re explaining your bubble. Option B: Pause the interaction For moments you feel too triggered to talk clearly.
“I can’t talk about this right now. Let’s pause and come back later.” “I need a bit of space. I’ll message you when I’m ready.” This is especially helpful with close family, partners, or older children.
It teaches them that your emotional capacity has limits – and that’s okay. Option C: Clear boundary / consequence For repeated pokes or people who don’t respect your bubble.
“If you keep commenting on my parenting like this, I’ll have to end the conversation.” “I’ve already said this topic is hurtful. If it continues, I’ll need to step back for a while.” You are not being dramatic.
You’re choosing self-respect over constant re-injury.
What about when the pokes come from our kids?
Sometimes the sharp words come from little mouths we love.
Exhausted kids can say things like: “You never listen!” “I hate you!” “You’re the worst mom!” Their words can slice right into the softest parts of our bubble. When that happens:
Remember their brain is still learning regulation.
Their words are often a storm of feelings, not a true verdict about you. You’re allowed to feel hurt.
You’re human, not a robot mom. You can model bubble talk: “Those words hurt my heart. I’m going to calm down and then we can talk.” “I love you, but I won’t let you speak to me like that.” This way, you protect both your bubble and theirs.
How to repair your bubble after a hard day
Some days, no matter how wise you are,
your bubble ends up feeling thin, leaky, or completely deflated. On those nights, try:
A small ritual – a cup of tranquil tea, a shower where you let the steam carry away the noise, or quiet breathing in bed. Bubble words –
“I am allowed to rest. I don’t have to fix every relationship tonight.” A journal line –
“Today poked my bubble when…
I will protect my bubble tomorrow by…” Think of it as patching a tiny hole.
Little repairs add up.
You’re not “too sensitive” – you’re deeply aware
People might say:
“You’re overreacting.” “It was just a joke.” “You’re too sensitive.” But your sensitivity is also why:
you notice small changes in your kids’ moods you catch things others miss your words, when you do share, feel so honest and healing Your bubble is not there because you’re weak.
It’s there because your heart is precious.
Our bubbles will get poked. That doesn’t mean we failed.
You can be doing all the right things –
resting, journaling, praying, breathing –
and still have days where one sentence ruins your whole mood. It doesn’t mean you’re back at zero.
It means you’re human. I still mess up Option A and jump straight to Option C when I’m tired. The key is just getting better at the repair work. The goal is not to have an unbreakable bubble.
The goal is to: notice when it’s poked, respond with more care than chaos, and slowly surround yourself with people who handle your bubble gently.
Part 3 of the Beautiful Bubble Series
This is Part 3 of my “Beautiful Bubble Series” –
for sensitive, big-hearted women learning to protect their peace in a noisy world. Part 1: Our Beautiful Bubble – Why Sensitive Moms Need a Safe Space to Breathe Part 2: Walls vs Bubbles – How to Protect Your Heart Without Pushing Everyone Away Part 3 (this one): When Your Bubble Gets Poked – Handling Criticism, Nagging and Emotional Triggers Coming soon: A Safe Bubble for Our Kids – Helping Children Feel Protected, Not Overprotected 💬 Before you go, here’s a gentle reflection: Who poked your bubble recently, and what would it look like to protect your peace next time without turning into stone? You can share in the comments if you feel safe,
or let it be a quiet question between you and your journal. Either way, I’m proud of you for guarding your beautiful bubble. 🫧💛